Working with aging clients : a guide for legal, business, and financial professionals

She is a consultant in aging and has been quoted in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Next Avenue, Financial Planning.com, AARP's publications, the National Safety Council journal, and many other sources, as well as appearing on radio, shows discussing questions about aging parents and clients. Ms. Rosenblatt blags weekly at Aging Parents on Forbes.com. She is also published in national legal and nursing journals on the legal aspects of caregiving, elder driving, resolving family conflict, and the healthcare issues of dementia. She is a frequent speaker for organizations, care facilities, and groups. She is the author of The Family Guide to Aging Parents, a help for those who are taking on the caregiver role and adjusting to changes of aging in their loved ones. Book jacket.

• Preface p. xv
• Introduction p. xix
• 1 Myths and Stereotypes About Aging p. 1
• Introduction p. 1
• What Does It Mean to Be "Old"? p. 1
• The Changes of Aging p. 2
• Society's Attitudes About Aging p. 3
• The Pervasiveness of Ageism p. 3
• Fear of Aging p. 4
• Stereotypes and the Effect on Elders p. 5
• The Risk of Not Being Heard p. 5
• The Risk of Social and Emotional Needs Being Overlooked p. 7
• Raising Our Own Awareness p. 8
• Overcoming Assumptions About Elders p. 9
• The Basis of Assumptions About Aging Persons p. 9
• Family Experiences with Aging Relatives p. 9
• The Effect of Broadening Our Experience of Older Persons p. 10
• Examining Our Feelings About Our Own Aging p. 10
• Medical Stereotyping of Elders p. 11
• Illustration: Richard's Case p. 12
• Addressing Medical Stereotyping p. 14
• Illustration: Jeanine's Case p. 14
• Conclusion p. 15
• 2 Challenges in Working with Elders p. 17
• Introduction p. 17
• Background p. 17
• Negative Aspects of Working with Aging Clients p. 19
• Family Dynamics in Working with Elders p. 21
• Helpful Attitudes You Can Adopt p. 22
• The Professional's Role: Remembering Quality of Life for Elders p. 23
• What Elders Need p. 24
• Recognizing What Is Different About Elders p. 25
• Watch for Vulnerabilities p. 25
• The Risk of Reliance on Elders' Self-Reported Information p. 26
• Confidentiality p. 27
• Physical Limitations p. 29
• Creating Impairments to Mimic Real Life p. 29
• Accommodating the Elder's Stamina Limitations p. 30
• Mental Capacity Limitations p. 31
• Legal Considerations of Mental Capacity p. 32
• Neuropsychological Testing for Capacity p. 33
• The "Gray Zone" p. 33
• The Value of Objective Information p. 36
• Accommodation for Diminished Mental Capacity p. 37
• How Do You Decide Whether an Impaired Client Can Participate in Legal Proceedings? p. 38
• Accommodating Diminished Capacity by Limiting Participation p. 39
• Other Questions Beyond Objective Data, Social Ability, and Stamina p. 39
• General Mobility Issues p. 41
• Working with Physical Impairments p. 42
• Hearing Loss p. 42
• Visual Impairment p. 43
• Accommodating Limited Activity Tolerance p. 45
• Travel Considerations p. 46
• Conclusion p. 46
• 3 Common Elder-Specific Issues p. 47
• Introduction p. 47
• Life Events p. 47
• Aging and Its Problem Areas p. 48
• Issues Surrounding the Cost of Caregiving p. 50
• Diminished Capacity issues p. 51
• Complexities of the Competency Issue p. 52
• How Can a Lawyer or Other Professional Tell If a Client Has Diminished Capacity? p. 52
• What Is the Extent of a Cognitively Impaired Elder's Rights? p. 57
• Illustration: Doing Exactly as the Impaired Client Asks p. 57
• Illustration: The Right to a Dangerous Decision-Marina's Mother Living Alone in the Family Home p. 58
• The Driving Dilemma: Should Lawyers Get Involved When a Client Is an Unsafe Driver p. 60
• How We Can Help p. 62
• Tips for the Conversation About Driving p. 64
• Dementia and Its Effect on Financial Capacity p. 65
• Financial Capacity Is Diminished Early with Dementia p. 65
• Financial Services Professionals and Elders with Cognitive Impairment p. 66
• Common Financial Transaction Issues p. 70
• Lack of Clear Policies Specific to Elders p. 71
• The Effect of Financial Elder Abuse p. 71
• Illustration of Diminished Capacity: Harold's Dispute p. 73
• Conclusion p. 76
• 4 Communication with Elders p. 79
• Introduction p. 79
• "The Handshake Generation" p. 80
• Attitudes About Finances p. 80
• The Resistant Spender p. 80
• The Careless Big Spender p. 81
• Secrecy About Finances p. 82
• The Difficult Elder, Resistance, and Control p. 83
• Fear and Resistance p. 84
• Communication About Giving Up Control p. 84
• Communicating with Depressed Elders p. 84
• Common Triggers of Resistance p. 86
• Confidentiality and Elder Abuse p. 88
• Summary: Top Ten Pointers for Successful Communication with Elders p. 89
• 1 Embrace a Client's Appreciation When You Can p. 90
• 2 Measure Your Pace p. 90
• 3 Consider Hearing Loss p. 90
• 4 Don't Mention the Lack of Devices the Elder Might Need but Doesn't or Won't Use p. 91
• 5 Take Bathroom Breaks Often p. 91
• 6 Ask for Feedback Frequently p. 91
• 7 Invite the Elder to Express His or Her Thoughts p. 92
• 8 Consider Your Environment and the Client's Physical Limitations p. 92
• 9 Remember Eye Contact p. 92
• 10 Use Touch Judiciously p. 93
• Conclusion p. 93
• 5 Elders and Family Conflicts p. 95
• Introduction p. 95
• Family Law Provides a Model for Collaborative Practice p. 95
• The Lawyer's Role p. 96
• Antecedents of Conflict in Families p. 97
• Focus on What Is Best for the Elder p. 98
• Consider a Family's History p. 98
• Alternatives to Engagement in Family Disputes About Elders p. 101
• Skills You Need: Interviewing a Prospective Client About a Family-Related Dispute p. 103
• Listening p. 104
• Reiterating and Adding Your Impressions p. 104
• Asking Probing Questions p. 104
• Ask About Others Who Have a Different Perspective p. 105
• If an Elder's Competency Is an Issue, Ask About Medical Information p. 105
• Sibling Issues p. 106
• Shared Responsibility on Legal Documents p. 106
• Caregiving Issues p. 107
• How to Pay the Cost of Care p. 107
• What Is the Cost of Long-Term Care? p. 108
• How Lawyers Can Help p. 109
• How to Handle an Elder's Escalating Needs p. 110
• Unequal Sharing of Responsibility for Parents p. 111
• Common Issues About the Right to Make Decisions p. 111
• Who Should Handle Finances? p. 111
• When Should the Successor Trustee Assume Responsibility? p. 112
• Disagreements About Competency of Aging Parents p. 113
• Undue Influence p. 113
• Taking Away the Car Keys p. 115
• Financial Abuse Accusations in Families p. 116
• Illustration: Daniel's Father p. 117
• End-of-Life Issues p. 118
• Prevention p. 119
• Hoarding and Other Intractable Problems p. 119
• Hoarding p. 119
• Mental Health Issues p. 120
• Substance Abuse p. 121
• General Perspectives in Working with Adult Families p. 122
• Conclusion p. 123
• 6 Using Mediation for Family Disputes About Elders p. 125
• Introduction p. 125
• What Is Mediation? p. 126
• Family Involvement p. 127
• Family Battleground Issues p. 128
• The Impact of Longevity p. 129
• Financial Pressure p. 130
• Exercising Professional Leadership p. 132
• What Makes a Good Mediator for Disputes Involving Elders? p. 133
• Basic Training p. 134
• Critical Skills p. 134
• Personal Qualities p. 136
• Willingness to Confront the Heart of Conflict p. 136
• Working with Two Mediators p. 138
• The Benefits of Having Two Mediators p. 138
• How a Mental Health Professional Can Help a Mediation p. 140
• Mental Health Issues in Working with Elders and Their Families p. 140
• The Role of Lawyers and Other Professionals Working with Difficult Families p. 142
• Estates and Trusts: Other Common Battleground Issues p. 142
• Finding a Mediator for Elder Disputes p. 144
• Conclusion p. 145
• Resources p. 147
• Publications p. 147
• Websites p. 148
• General Information p. 148
• Safe Driving p. 148
• Aging Parents and Adult Children p. 148
• To Find a Mediator p. 149